As the Clock Runs on Towards Midnight

With what is for me "The" concert fast approaching (THIS FRIDAY!!), it's a daily fight -- no, make that an hourly fight-- to keep from letting the hundreds of little preparations darken my mind. Sometimes I feel like come 7 pm on Friday, I'll turn into a pumpkin instead of direct a group of wonderful, albeit small, singers, and individual performers whom I've auditioned, coached and approved. Pray for me! I do NOT want to be stressed. As a certain Prince of mine reminded me "Life is better lived enjoyed."

A sweet reprieve in this cloudiness came as I heard this song over the radio in the school office. It teared me up then, and as I listened to it now I outright cried. It's for every daughter and every father, or anyone who hopes to become one... for anyone who has sweet memories, or hard regrets, or hope for the futures... because the clock DOES strike midnight, but it's never too late to have one last dance. I love you, Daddy.



--Christina
PS Here's the "Story Behind the Song"

Cute Little Girls Singing BIG SONGS

This adorable little girl can be found performing in both Mandarin and English on YouTube... amazing pitch matching for a 2 year old!!! :)


Singing "Amazing Grace"


Singing "The Lord's Prayer" (I LOVE her hand motions)

And lastly, but not leastly, my friend Sarah's little girl, Maddie. And again.

Makes a music teacher's heart happy.

Which reminds me...

Let me just share one thing that I KNOW you do NOT want to instill in your kids. Several of my middle schoolers- boys- have lately decided that singing is not manly. When I've probed and prodded them on the issue, more than one has said; "Oh, I'm just like my Dad-- he doesn't sing at church, either." YIKES!! I'm quite sure that hearing their sons say that would break their dads' hearts-- these are men who deeply desire to raise up godly offspring. They likely either don't realize how much their sons are watching them during worship, or how important singing (and music) is to God. We've got a whole book FULL of commands to do it!! (The Psalms)

Whatever happened to heartfelt singing being a part of godly manhood? King David, slayer of Goliath and greatest leader of Isreal was also the main psalmist... most of the musicians recorded for us in Scripture are MEN!! (Asaph, Hiram, the Sons of Korah...) So, Dads, and single guys for that matter, consider your MUSICAL testimony as part of your ministry to those around you, especially those looking up to you. Don't be the kind of father who makes your child's teachers cringe. Or your child's Father cringe...

Portland in Pictures

Alone on top of a wide, green world; the view from Rob & Joanna's living room

Well, have at 'em! I've got two whole albums for ya to see. :)

Portland, Oregon: The first chronicles Sunday - Wednesday of our trip; the house, Israeli folk dancing, the Evergreen Aviation Museum (aka Spruce Goose museum) & Vineyards, and several meals (lots of cooking styles; Southern, Thai, then Lebanese). Most are taken in Portland, but some are taken in Lincoln City, by the coast, and on the way there. See Ryan's blog for a full account of Tuesday's excursions! (let me say here that the food at Andaman Thai tasted every bit as good as it looked... and it looked... amazing.)

We also had a get-together of our extended family "on Joanna's side" at Ya Halla! (the Lebanese restaurant where Ryan's parents threw us a celebratory feast when we got engaged last year. It's becoming a tradition!)-- all of Ryan's steps and their families were there; Willy & Iala, Jenny & Aaron and little Shyanna, and James & Mindy.

Portland II: this covers Thursday - Sunday; return to Multnomah Falls, Shabbat meal, and our time in the Midway (Chicago) Airport

And, We're Back!

Well, guys, it was a wonderful week. My Uncle Duncan (who is a pilot with Southwest) & Aunt Robin gave us 2 "buddy passes" as a graduation gift, good for any round-trip in the States. We redeemed them this past week by flying out to Portland, Oregon, to visit Ryan's father & step-mother there. It was pretty much a perfect "Spring Break."

I promise I DID try to update while we were there, but encountered enough technical difficulties that Ryan urged me to scrap it. When HE (Mr. computer-nerd-himself) says that, I figure it's a lost cause. ANYWAY we got held up in Chicago last night, and flew in to Louisville this morning early enough to make Sunday School, if that tells you how early we got up. In other words, I am tired. Too tired to make a post... it'd be run-on and boring anyway.

The pictures are me being my goofy-wired-self at 6 am Central Time, in the Midway Airport. We always wanted to spend a weekend in Chicago... too bad we got in too late and left too early to see anything but street lights...

I want to go to bed!! I think I just might. Work tomorrow does NOT sound appealing. But a thankful heart is a happy heart... so here I go, smiling. :)

--Christina

Long Overdue...

(her birthday was last Monday)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MOM!!!

We love you and are so thankful for you! :) Your smile lights up every family gathering... not to mention the food & the hugs...

from our last family get-together, at the end of March

"She opens her mouth with wisdom,and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue. She looks well to the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. [...] Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Give her of the fruit of her hands,and let her works praise her in the gates."

Proverbs 31:26- 31 (ESV)

"Expelled"

I've heard people compare the Intelligent Design/Darwinian Evolution debate to the Copernican Revolution many times... this interview does it in a wholly different way. Check it out!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY RILEY

My cousins Riley & Conner (Thompson) on New Year's Eve

[Riley is the lanky smiler on the left]

Riley,

Ryan & I love you, and we are SO proud of the young man you are becoming! You have a tender, kind heart-- we see this especially when you play with little bitty kids like Collin and Caroline. We love the heart God has given you to pray; please keep praying for us, and for God's kingdom to get bigger, all around the world!

We are so thankful that our Lord has already called you His Own, and that you are following and loving Him! Never stop doing that! We pray that you "bear much fruit" as you grow up, so that everyone can see that you really are a branch that's been planted in our Vine, Jesus Christ. God has made you just the way you are, on purpose... and we love you that way. :) The best birthday (or any day) message anyone could give you:

"For [you] are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. [...] Remember that you were at [one] time separated from Christ, [...] having no hope and without God in the world. But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far off have been brought near by the blood of Christ. [...] For through him we [...] have access in one Spirit to the Father." (Eph. 2:10-18)

Live a life of obedience, remembering who you used to be and who you are now: love Jesus, pray LOTS, and serve His church.

We love you, Riley Bear!

Love,
~Christina & Ryan

Grammar Fun

“The adjective is the banana peel of the parts of speech.”

~J Clifton Paul Fadiman

Friends in Hard Times

Many of you know and love the Shueys, a family who was sent by Grace Baptist Church (in Greenville, SC) to Louisville to attend seminary (Southern). They were my neighbors in Greenville, 5 houses down, and they're my neighbors again here, and so much more... basically the closest to family we have here in Greenville. Dave is a pastor-elder at our church here, though now he is on sabbatical due to the intense pressures on him and our church body at large lately... most of you have been praying for Christy & Ryan Fullerton (our preaching pastor) and Jeff & Christy King (our counseling pastor), and you know that the brunt of the pastoral burden was on Dave, as our only pastor NOT spending large amounts of his time in the hospital. Well, the Lord saw him & his family through that time, and is continuing to sustain them through seemingly deeper and deeper waters. They have had one "curveball" after another thrown at them-- I mean, pretty much any category you can make up, the Lord has seen them through it lately. From car damage, to mugging, to an unexpected need for foster-parent certification, to (in some ways most wearing) general schedule upheaval, to the latest, which I'll elaborate momentarily. They have been tested and tried in many ways, and are responding in faith and trust, to the GLORY of our Good & Faithful Father, Suffering Savior, and Strengthening Spirit.

Most lately, their oldest daughter, Morgan has had a sustained illness that is so far unexplained. It's just serious enough to be alarming, though at this point there is no actual diagnosis...just lots of tests, which leave a large enough question to be vaguely unsettling. Please pray for peace for Dave & Sina, grace and physical strength for Morgan (she was in good spirits, though weak, when I saw her an hour ago), and for insight for the doctors.

PLEASE encourage the Shueys!! If you know them, or even if you don't, please e-mail them, call them, or send them a card. If you want their contact info, email me for it, or send an email to me and I will immediately forward it to them.

This passage is SO relevant to them and to YOU, dear readers. Please join me in incarnating Scripture!

"For we do not want you to be ignorant, brothers, of the affliction we experienced in Asia. For we were so utterly burdened beyond our strength that we despaired of life itself. Indeed, we felt that we had received the sentence of death. But that was to make us rely not on ourselves but on God who raises the dead. He delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us. On him we have set our hope that he will deliver us again. You also must help us by prayer, so that many will give thanks on our behalf for the blessing granted us through the prayers of many."

Second Corinthians 1:8-11

In praise of that same God-who-raises-the-dead,

~Christina

The Ups and Downs of Adoption- Please Pray

I just received the following email from a family in our church who has been trying to adopt... Please pray for peace in their hearts, and grace for this baby girl-- please, Lord, let her be kept in this believing home!!

--Christina

"Dear All,

The below email was supposed to send yesterday, but failed. I have kept it for you to read. Please pray for us. There is a chance that Amber will leave our home and go back to the birthmom. This grieves our hearts.

Please Pray.

Love,Weyland & Katie

_______________________________________________________

Family & Friends,Many thanks for all the prayers, phone calls, help & encouragement!Sorry for the lack of communication. . .we forgot our computer power cord! Weyland made many trips to Radio shack and best buy to try and find something compatible with our laptop and he just now figured it out! Thanks Weyland!

Here are some pictures of our beautiful Amber Kate! She is such a good baby and we are amazed that God has given us this precious gift to steward! We are still in here waiting for our paperwork to clear and the birth mom's rights to be completely terminated. Please pray for this process to be speedy and successful! If everything goes well, we could be home by Wednesday or thursday, or have to stay as long as another week past that time! Amber is a trooper and has adjusted to our current nomad lifestyle! We have been so blessed by friends and friends of friends who have hosted us these last few days! What a blessing to not be stuck in a motel for weeks!

Amber Says Hello. . .she is six days old today!

We love you all,

Weyland & Katie"

Nostalgia...

“The family. We were a strange little band of characters trudging through life sharing diseases and toothpaste, coveting one another's desserts, hiding shampoo, borrowing money, locking each other out of our rooms, inflicting pain and kissing to heal it in the same instant, loving, laughing, defending, and trying to figure out the common thread that bound us all together.”

~Erma Bombeck

yet another nugget of a reward found in coordinating the 3rd grade lesson plans at DSCS... :)

p.s. Now reading with Ryan: On the Edge of the Dark Sea of Darkness. How is it? Well, let me put it this way: it's been at the back of my mind all day, and I keep looking foward to the moment when I'll get to read some more with Ryan!! ...hehehe after I take him on our surprise date...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, GRAMPS!!

Ryan says he always remembers you as the man who took him fishing and to Disney World, and probably always will. :) I know you as the man who adopted me straight into your clan, whose smile and gentle welcome still make me feel loved and accepted. We love you, Grandpa!!

(here he is deep in concentration, trying to help his team win over Thanksgiving...)

We hated missing the party this weekend... HAPPY 70th BIRTHDAY!!! We see this being true in your life, and pray it always is!

"The righteous flourish like the palm treeand grow like a cedar in Lebanon.
They are planted in the house of the Lord;they flourish in the courts of our God.
They still bear fruit in old age; they are ever full of sap and green,
to declare that the Lord is upright; He is my rock, and there is no unrighteousness in Him." Psalm 92:12-15

-- your Szrama grandkids in Louisville

Being Appreciated...

Thursday was "Tutor Appreciation Day" at our school. As Corrie Ann & I were saying, "I LOVE being appreciated." Heheh, especially when the appreciation includes yummy FOOD!! Which it did. For me, that was thanks to Sina Shuey, who completely spoiled me (and made everyone not allergic to gluten/soy jealous) with a scrumptious salad, topped with mandarin oranges, carmelized almond slivers, and a homemade dressing; vegetable lasagna; garlic bread, and an entire tupperware full of chocolate chip almond scones!! Dude, I wasn't hungry again until 7 pm!!

For your enjoyment, some excerpts from my students' notes of appreciation (some are from the preschoolers, some from middle school choir students):

"Dear MRS. SZRAMA...we love being in your class. Thank you for being our teacher!! We love you more than we can explaine..."

"Dear Mrs. Szrama, I like when you teach me (I like my classmates, too!) I like when you hug me. You are my Valentine. Thank you because I love you. Thank you for telling me about Jesus. You are my friend. When you teach me I love you."

"Mrs. Szrama, thank you for teaching. It's been fun."

"Mrs. Szrama, thank you so much for teaching me choir. I have learned so much about notes and stuff. :)"

"...Thanks for letting your love for music and for our Lord overflow to our children" (from a Mom)

"Mrs. Szrama, thank you for teaching our choir this year. I alreday enjoy singing but you made the class so fun!!" "Mrs. Szrama- Thank you so much for teaching me choir. I love it! You are a great, great, GREAT teacher." (don't you know I love that!?) "Choir is my favorite subject!!" Mrs. Szrama, Thank you for teaching choir this year. I've learned a lot. Hope you're my teacher next year."

"Dear Mrs. Sarama, please have "Tender Mercy." From, G." ("Tender Mercy" is a song one choir is singing) That one made me bust out laughing!

"Dear Mrs. Szrama, Thank you so much for giving your time to teach us how to sing! You are very pretty and you are a great teacher. Hope you have a great day! Thank you! Love, S. :)"

One that especially meant a lot, because I've prayed for this child over and over: "Mrs. Szarama, I love you so much. You are a wonderful teacher and person. I admire you for everything you do and I hope one day to be just as kind and loving as you are. Thank you so much for your support. You don't understand how much it means to me!..."

...And then it's always heart-warming to read "You rock, Mrs. Szrama!"

Several of my Moms were so encouraging in their notes, telling me that I have made a difference in their child's life, and that my labor has already borne some fruit. That is so encouraging!! It has also served as a reminder to live righteously all the time: as I stubbornly refused to submit myself to Christ (and my husband), these words came to mind "You are a special light in their lives and you show them Jesus every day..." Was I showing Jesus to my husband right then? What about to the angels and demons?

Anyway, those are some scattered thoughts I wanted to share... my world every day. :)

Something About...

...Mom waiting for you when you get home from school...

If you were a child who grew up expecting this, secure in the comfort that Mom would be home after school-- would make after school "home"-- you know what I mean. Those of you who missed out on this blessing can imagine it, I'm sure. For us homeschoolers/private- schoolers, Mom often either never left school, or picked us up from school, but still... I remember the pan-grilled-cheese sandwiches and BLTs Mom made after school on homeschool days, or the way we'd unload from the van to get shooed outside (Mom knew we needed a mental break after school), then called back inside for our snack before we started in on homework again.

I got a little taste of that again last week, when my Mom came to visit us. And oh, yum! It was a SWEET taste! :) Home really is where your family is. I usually come home from work, and it's just me. I really enjoy getting the empty house ready for my family (Ryan) to come home-- filling it with clean-house and dinner-cooking smells, and emptying it of eye-sore mess. Then Ryan comes home from work, and I get to welcome him, and then it REALLY feels like "home." On two days last week, though, I pulled up to the 2-story house on Camp Street, and there already was a familiar face brightening the house. Heheh, both times I came home, Mom was doing yard work! Let me tell you, my Mom put me to SHAME!!! She came to serve, not be serve, and serve us she did! She did everything from the yard work to helping with floor-finishing to house-cleaning to coffee-grinding to cutting my hair to filling our fridge with tasty groceries!! AND she always offered to help cook dinner, and wanted to treat us when we went out... it really amazed me. The last two afternoons of her visit, she came WITH me to school, and served me AND my students there!! The preschoolers LOVED her, and she fit right into their little world. (those little ones are so blessed; their worlds are full of adults who love them and teach them of Jesus!!)

Mom came and just lived with us for 5 days, and we did our best to show her a full picture of our life in Louisville. Some of our excursions were not so exciting- Kroger, the gas station, the bank, etc. Some were a little more adventurous, and thus merited photographic documentation:

One of our favorite "hole-in-the-wall" eateries: the Santa Fe Mexican Grill. (on 3rd street...the purple building. If you're a Louisvillian, you've GOT to check it out!!) Ryan enjoyed being one of the few gringos there, and I got a HUGE kick out of this sign!

(it reads "We have a fresh-squeeze limenade. No free refills!") I just kept giggling every time I read it!

The Americano examining his "Americano burrito." This was a momentous occasion for Ryan; his first time branching out at a favorite restaurant -maybe ever! (he always gets the same thing everytime, every where we go... ;D)

Sorry for the zoomed-out-edness of all these pics. I haven't figured out how to crop pics on Ryan's mondo desktop (my laptop still lies, useless and un-alive...)

On Tuesday, I introduced Mom to "Napoleon Dynamite" as Ryan taught at the T-house. We stayed up a full hour after we went to bed quoting it to each other, lol. I think Moms of college students can appreciate that movie as few other post-teenagers can.

Wednesday, Mom & I had a fun time on my favorite street; Bardstown Road (despite the pouring rain. I think that's the only time I've ever deposited money at a bank solely for the purpose of using their parking lot! Drastic times call for...) We ate at the Butterfly Garden Cafe, which we HIGHLY reccommend, and browsed around the White Linen Tea Company, and the Clay & Cotton. No pictures, alas. :( I think we were all encouraged by Immanuel's midweek prayer meeting that night. Mom & I also managed to squeeze in a coffee date between my classes on Thursday, and she got to watch me conduct my 5/6th grade choir! I think they behaved better with Mom in the room. :) As House MD put it, "I think the world would be a better place if everyone lived like their Moms were looking over their shoulders." Some pre-school pics:

(during our music time)

(getting ready to put our flowers on the Living Cross, for Easter)

We had a last hoorah on Friday morning before Mom left, getting up a little early so we could breakfast at Lynn's Paradise Cafe. It was SO yummy, and so much fun!! I just love that place. What more could I- a girl who loves breakfast foods best of all, and is a little on the "nuts" side- ask for? Mom & I split a fantastic omlette (a dish she raised me to enjoy... actually, that was the first dish I ever cooked! ...though I don't know how Mom ate it... I didn't even put salt or pepper in it...yuck...)

My husband, VERY eager to eat his french toast.

All of us after a yummy meal. This weekend Ryan dubbed himself my Mom's "baby-in-law," and the term has stuck. Lol...

Everyone who knew my Mom was in town last week is asking me this week if I miss her. I guess they could see her missableness, just from that one meeting. And they are quite right. I do miss her. Thank you God for Mommys! I'm off!

--Christina

Who Knew!?

It's amazing the stuff you find out when researching for 3rd grade Phonogram Assignments...

It all started out with the poem our DSCS 3rd graders are reading this week. First off, I had no idea who this poem was by, so I had to research that. (Lord, thank You for giving me free internet access, and putting it in the hearts of scholars to make anthologies available, and SEARCHABLE online. I mean that prayer!) After a little digging, I found a great gem of a story! How many of you are familiar with King Sethon of Egypt? Now don't you be scared because the lines don't reach all the way across the page. Poetry ain't scary. 'Specially not the kind 3rd graders read. ;)

"Sethon"
by Maud Keary
From Enchanted Tulips and other Verses for Children, published in 1914

KING SETHON of Egypt
Cried out in his woe,
"My kingdom will perish,
My race be brought low.

"Ruthless Sennacherib
With warriors draws near
To conquer our country
With arrow and spear.

"Our men are a handful;
In vain we contend;
Vain, vain is our struggle--
But short be the end!"

Beneath the clear starlight
Of Egypt he stood,
The invaders' camp stretched
Far away like a wood;

When lo! through the stillness
Arose a strange sound,
A scratching and scraping
Came up from the ground.

And thick as when corn-blades
Each leaps forth a tongue,
Some thousands of field-mice
From the warm soil sprung.

They scrambled up palings
And scaled pediments--
They sped past King Sethon
To the enemies' tents.

And there helter-skelter,
They seized on the quivers,
They nibbled the bowstrings,
Bit into shivers

The wooden shield-handles
The enemies used,
Who woke in the morning
Surprised and confused!

Without arms, defenceless,
They fled fast before
The happy Egyptians,
And came back no more.

Then a statue of Sethon
Was made--very grand--
A crown on his head and
A mouse in his hand!

I was like "what is that talking about!?" So I did some digging, and HERE's the background story! King Sethon was a priest of Vulcan reigning in Egypt at the same time that King Hezekiah ruled Judah. He offended the soldiers of Egypt by taking away the land allowance they’d always been given. Therefore, when Sennacherib of Assyria invaded in 713 BC, no soldiers would defend Egypt. The legend is that Sethon prayed in great anquish all night, until he received a vision from his god that the god would win the victory for Egypt. Comforted, Sethon marched out with a group of non-soldiers. During the night, they were indeed delivered, by a very surprising force!

Even more intriguing: some historians believe that this story is a corrupted version of Judah’s miraculous delivery from Sennacherib’s army by the might of the One True God, recorded in 2 Kings 19!

Source: Ancient History, Vol 1: History of the Egyptians [and lots of other people. seriously, the title stretched on for lines and lines]. By Charles Rollins, 1844.

That story captured my fancy, for some reason. History is so cool!! WHY am I not a literature or a history teacher??? Choir... what was I thinking!?

...off to grade papers for said class... sigh...

Squirmenutics

Thank you, Jeannette...

Please, all you aspiring ministers... don't end up like this. It would be funny, except it's so SAD!!

And read all the follow-up comments. They're thought-provoking and at times hilarious. For an example of a thought-provoking one, Byron Harvey said...
"An observation: as a recovering fundamentalist (now an E Free pastor, still solidly evangelical, so don't worry), I spent some time in fundamentalist churches, and was educated at independent Baptist schools. There was much good there, but the truth is that some of the people who defended the inerrancy of the Bible the strongest did the most absolutely hideous job of actually preaching it. In that sense, this gentleman follows in a long, but sad, line..."

Blue Chair Blues

Grandma & Grandpa Presley gave us a very comfy BIG blue recliner, and it graces the corner of our little living room. (getting it here in the back of our truck over the mountains was quite its own adventure) It's the spot of choice on cold dark mornings before school; I eat my breakfast and drink my coffee in coziness and warmth as I read my Bible and pray. Ryan usually finds me curled up in it grading or reading or writing letters as he gets home. Before my laptop went nuts it was the perfect spot to sit and work on lesson plans, too. Ryan loves to sit there to study himself...on Tuesdays before he teaches at the Transformation House, I try to leave the chair for him. :) And after he tucks me into bed he usually reads there... sometimes I awaken in the wee hours of the morning and he's STILL in there, quite comfortable and sleeping happily. All that to say, we love our big blue chair.

I just dropped Ryan off at the airport; the first time I've done such a thing since marriage. The last time I did that, I cried (it was when we parted ways in Cincinnati after getting engaged in Oregon, last February). This time I got it out of my system a little before the parting... in the big blue chair, actually. Ryan's boss' girlfriend was going to pick him up on the way to getting Andy (Ryan's boss) to the airport, but I wanted the extra minutes so we called and canceled...and spent the short sweet time cuddled in the big blue chair, and just being together a little more. I cried... more at the anticipation of the missing-him-pain (I remember it way too well) than actual current pain. I was against his chest, after all, still comforted by the smell and feel of him...

"I'd rather you be leaving and be married to you than be saying goodbye without being married," I said. "I'd rather be married and leaving and sad than married and leaving and not sad," he answered. "It's right that we should want to be together. It's good to be sad that we have to be apart."

It's true, what Ryan said: it's good that we should miss each other. It's good that we should be sad and cry. It's good that there is love and one heart that hurts to be apart. I'm married now; not just myself, but part of a new One Flesh... Hmmm... guess that's why the blue chair makes me sad to look at just now. And happy, too. :)

It IS only for 5 days. And we'll both be happy and doing things we love to do. And we'll both rejoice in the presence of the Lord, and pray for the other's good...like every day. :) But just right now, in the "meantime," (Dad, you'll catch my reference) I think I may curl up in the big blue chair and seek a little solace. Prayer, the Word, my journal, a book, and just maybe some of that dark chocolate my Love gave me for Valentine's day. :)

Happy Lord's Day.
--Christina

Married in the Mirror

Sometimes the briefest conversations leave me with the deepest thoughts. You know what I mean? John Piper once wrote that "books don't change people: paragraphs do. At times even sentences." (and of course that's all I remember about that particular book, lol) Today I spoke ever-so-briefly with Rob Hamby, who was my campus minister (RUF) at Furman for my senior year in high school through my junior year of college. Anyway, long story short I haven't talked to him since I got married, and haven't seen him for longer than that. He asked how I was doing, and since he's a pastor and all, and a respected friend, I confessed "it's wonderful, being married... but honestly, you technically know you're "totally depraved," but I didn't believe I was totally totally depraved until I got married. Now I know ...all this sin just comes out. (I laughed) Ryan reminds me that it was always there, it just maybe would have stayed hidden longer." Then Rob said, in that quick way of his, exactly what I was thinking, in a way I'd never said it:

"That's right, marriage changes everything. It's a whole new way of looking in the mirror."

We said our goodbyes and "God bless"s, and hung up. Who knows when I'll get to enjoy his & Kendall's company... I'm sure their kids, Wells & Simeon, are nigh unrecognizable to me by now. But, Rob, wherever you are, your words have again taught me. "A whole new way of looking in the mirror." The mirror...seeing myself, in reaction to another, in the eyes of another Image-Bearer; another "God-with-skin," as Ben Patterson puts it. A whole new way of seeing myself as Scripture reveals me to be... a whole new avenue for the Sword of the Spirit to lay me open.

Amen.

It's off to watch Final Fantasy VII, Advent Children with my Mirror. Hey, Trin, I recognize the music!! :)

---EDIT:--- Sunday, March 2nd:
From my friend Kelsey's Blog...

"[...] Or how living in community truly causes you to see yourself? Which can make you want to just completely run the other way and not face any of your own sin or false identities. This season in my life, Jesus is my Healer. I find him taking the broken pieces and healing it in His time and His way, but also finding that He is bringing complete freedom and healing in areas that seem to have an unpliable grip and stronghold."

I pray that last part is true of me!

Business as Usual?

I'm currently listening to Wayne Grudem's 5-part series which is so graciously available for free download through Sovereign Grace Ministries' store. Too often, we don't talk about money as the very spiritual thing (as Ryan Fullerton reminds) that it is a holy way, then are suprised that people do unholy things with it...that doesn't make sense! I really found Grudem's session on investment helpful. As my Dad pointed out, we do have to live in the world, and in some ways the mere fact of our being here advances the causes of sin. Everything's so connected: when I buy one thing, my money goes to the company, which may support other less wholesome things, etc. I guess that means we should work even HARDER to advance causes of the Kingdom?

Anyway, as I said I'm really appreciating the talks, but have several nagging questions which I fear Mr. Grudem doesn't address at all. So much of our consumerism --our "good business" as he calls it-- in the States is driven by an impoverishing of other nations. There is a short flash video online that is a helpful starting point. Taken with a grain of salt (there's no need to sound like a snarky liberal nor to over-simplify facts) there is ample food for thought for the Christian...

There are two main problems I as a Christian see with our modus operandus today:
1) harmful stewardship: irresponsible impoverishing of the earth's natural resources-- the dumping of un-biodegradable substances (such as plastic) into natural areas, like the seas, is harmful pollution, not merely a stride forward in human comfort and convenience-- it's absolutely contrary to everything God does in caring for and creating His creation.
2) lack of neighbor-love --when we dump our trash or impoverish the lands of the "Third World," we actually harm those living nearby. We also take advantage of them when our companies fail to provide good working environments or provide a living wage, or when we buy from companies which fail in these areas. There is nothing holy in laziness or selfishness... and often that's what makes us into a nation of consumers.

These questions of neighbor love, and of responsible stewardship/care for Creation pop up that aren't addressed if all we look at is the end product in American hands. Sure, a piece of plastic may seem convenient (helpful), cheap and good use of creativity, but is it really? Something which is so "cheap" here in the US is really soooo expensive, and someone has to pay it. At times the hidden costs are shocking: the "Made in ___" products we buy so cheaply (ex. electronics) are, at times, assembled by imprisoned Christians in horrible conditions, or the ones we buy expensively (ex. gems) are, all too often, obtained at the cost of children's or other innocent lives (watch Blood Diamond if you need convincing).

- What about all the by-products of its production, including fuel and energy used to ship it?
- Where will it go when I'm done with it? (most plastics ARENT bio-degradeable) How will we increase the earth's productivity (which Grudem reminds us is good) if we're polluting it?
- Where did it come from (is it a resource that is too limited to consume so much of it? did we retrieve it responsibly or recklessly?) For these last 2 questions, we have to remember that spoiling land isn't loving to the people who have to live on or around it...
- What about the ones who assembled it-- how were they treated? Reading biographies of some members of the persecuted church, and how they were forced to assemble electronics for sale in the West, under horrible conditions in prison camps, I realize why China can sell stuff so cheaply...

What are your thoughts? I'm trying to make sense of this all myself, and would be interested in you all's perspective as those devoted to God's Word and His Smile.

--The Szrama Mama

[Side Note: We have some friends who run a food co-op here in Louisville, and they have some very strong opinions about being Christians and consumers-- ecological responsibility, neighbor-love, etc. They take it a little further than I'm comfortable taking it without binding someone's conscience where Scripture doesn't, but still, they make you think.]

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