Let me just confess these things:
- I haven't been blogging or online much lately because looking at electronic things aggravates my near-constant nausea...
- When I'm not nauseated, I'm ravenous. Often I can't tell the difference (yuck, I know). I out-eat Ryan hands down, especially when it comes to meat.
- For Valentine's Day Dinner, I had two homemade cheeseburgers, with homemade guacamole, tomatoes, mustard, and ketchup... along with about half a dozen pickles... and I was still hungry an hour later. By the way, that meal is about all that sounds good most days. I think my mom craved california (aka w/ guacamole) veggie burgers while pregnant with me... did something rub off?
- Ryan & my mom gave me baby toys as part of their Valentine gifts to me.
- My body contradicts itself: despite the fact that I've been forced by intense hunger to nearly double my caloric intake, my weight is spiraling down (I'm not throwing up, either). Despite that, several skirts and pants don't fit, and my tummy is definitely pooching OUT.
- My dad got the following text message from two seperate friends after completing his first marathon on Saturday: "3 hrs 15 minutes...not bad FOR A GRANDPA!"
- Fruits have all-new meanings for me...
And then if you are still wondering, here's the announcement!!!
Yes, I am pregnant! There's been 9 weeks of baby-knitting (as Psalm 139 would say) going on somehow within me. It's pretty amazing. I am in awe of how these cells know how to take off and build a human out of two gametes!!! The Lord's handiwork is so clearly seen-- my four-year-olds just learned the verse "You knit me together in my mother's womb; I will praise You for I am fearfully and wonderfully made!" (Ps. 139) WOW!! It's quite astounding to have some other force take over your body-- from INSIDE YOUR OWN SKIN. All of a sudden my whole body is morphing, my senses are exploding, my appetite is foreign, ravenous, and confusing, and ...I still look exactly the same to most people! Amazing that something so small could put off enough hormones to totally control my body. Or, as I think of myself in jest, the Mother Ship. :)
Seriously, Ryan and I could not be happier. We told our family and far-away close friends on Valentine's Day, by sending them Valentines from us + baby. I told my classes at school, and we broke it to our Sunday School class yesterday. Since now everyone can know, Ryan was indiscriminately announcing it every time I turned around at church last night, lol. Praise the Lord! We joke about hoping it's twins-- of course we know that it already is or isn't twins, but we'd really really really like children, and figure why not!? Hehe we'll be thrilled and overwhelmed with just ONE, we know.
Please pray for our baby's continued safety, as well as my stamina and sanctification. It's so easy to fall prey to sins like snapping, being emotionally volatile, or complaining right now! Please pray that I will receive and ask for extra grace to be kind and generous, with my students, friends, and especially with my husband. He's been such a trooper --the dishes are particularly repugnant to me most nights, and so he washes them cheerfully... among other things. Pray for him, too! And most of all, please rejoice with us! Even if something were to go terribly wrong, we still have loved being "invisible parents" for the past two months, and there still is a mini-Szrama alive (and kicking now!), made in the image of God (and I hope his Daddy =D), with a soul that will never die. That is always, already something to rejoice in!