More Snowy Fun

Ryan all cozy and snug in his "office." Right after this he asked me to move the radiator closer to him so he could be even more cozy.





Ryan, ready to brave the ice & snow (he still has a cough, so we were trying to keep him extra-bundled). And he had just taken a shower, so he had wet hair.

My little tagalong was fascinated with my hairbrush. This provided at least 15 minutes of silent fun. I really mean silent. If I hadn't been sitting right there watching him, I'da thought he was doing something bad!

25 Random Things About Me

So... I've gotten tagged I think 5 times now.  No one need feel obligated to post, but if you're reading this and feel inspired to tell all about yourself, please consider yourself tagged. :)

1. The longest I have ever been at the same school was college- Furman for four full, expensive years. :)
2. I've been to every type of school I can think of: U.S. public, U.S. private, homeschool, classical school, bi-lingual (French-English), foreign public (Ecole Elementaire Publique de Chateaugay), foreign private Catholic (St. Cecile in Cebazat, France), and boarding school (college). I also commuted to college from my parents' house one year.
3. My favorite model of education is the classical method, especially when combined with home-schooling in the primary and middle school years. I now teach in a classical home-school/school (we have the kids 2 days a week, and tell the parents what to teach them 3 days at home).
4. I completed the Pre-Health Certificate requirements in college even though I was a music education major.
5. I still dream of becoming a nurse-midwife (Master of Science of Nurse Midwifery) -- I even know what schools I want to go for for my second bachelor's (BSN), and my master's.
6. All of my closest friends are older than I am, including my husband.
7. In college, my roommate and I shared our first name, telephone, classes, textbook, major department (music), clothes, and shoes. Is it any wonder we picked nicknames for ourselves?
8. My college nickname was Jocelyn, and a good many college buddies still refer to me and call me that. (My roomie took on the name Trinity. I still call her Trin, usually.)
9. I currently am a preschool teacher as well as a middle-school and high-school choir teacher. I'm about to step in as the high school chemistry substitute.
10. I want to have lots of children, and pray often about adoption and foster-parenting as a part of that. Ryan says "we'll see." =D
11. I enjoy writing curriculum.
12. I believe correct grammar and a grasp of how grammar works is absolutely essential to good communication and grasp of a language. Yep, that's why I'm a classical school teacher... and it helps that I've had to learn several foreign languages and understand their grammar.
13. A huge pet peeve of mine is misplaced apostrophes.
14. I speak/read/write English, French, and Spanish fluently, and can take on an Argentine, Castillian, or Guatamalan accent for the latter. I can read and translate Latin fairly well (especially with my handy dictionary close-by). I also can understand and stumble along in Italian, Catalan, and Portuguese (on my study abroad in Italy I somehow wound up translating at times... scary).
15. I'm super-excited that my husband's in seminary, mostly because I plan to read and learn along with him.
16. I dream of learning Greek and Hebrew. Irish Gaelic, too. :)
17. I also dream of one day hiking the entire Appalachian trail.
18. My senior year of college, I worked three jobs (only one of them paying), and commuted half an hour one-way to both my student teaching site and my university. The three jobs were: student teaching intern in an elementary school, student chaplain on-call at Greenville Memorial Hospital, and catering assistant at Furman's catering business (I HATE Aramark). I was also planning a wedding, trying to spend some time with my family, taking my last college class, and job-hunting 4 states away. The Lord showed His power to sustain-- me, and especially my poor fiance who bore the brunt of my exhaustion!
19. Countries starting with the letter "I" hold a special fascination for me; Israel, Ireland, Iceland, India, and Indonesia all beckon me. I want to backpack across Iceland. Ryan, are you reading this? :)
20. I have Celiac's disease (I can't digest gluten, the protein in most grains), as well as a severe soy intolerance. Thank the Lord I'm no longer lactose-intolerant, too. Yeah, the fact that I'm allergic to life doesn't stop the Szrama-mobile from gallivanting around the globe. :)
21. My dad's paternal family has a lot of Irish blood (my dad, his brother and his sister all have or have had red hair)-- I blame that for my love of all things Irish. I research Irish myths and history, and in college won a contest for my research paper on early Irish music. If you ever want to get me fired up about it, you're in for a long conversation!! :)
22. My new hero in the faith is "St." Patrick. That man was zealous for the Savior he loved, and a deeply committed pastor of his people. His writings drip Gospel and Christ-centeredness. He reads like the Apostle Paul, Augustine, CS Lewis, CJ Maheny and John Piper, when it comes to deeply enjoying and finding satisfaction in the Triune God.
23. Green beans still make me shudder.
24. As a child, my greatest disappointment was finding out that there was no frontier anymore. I really wanted to be a pioneer. I make up for it by still trying to do everything "in-house" that I can. Waste not, want not, you know!
25. I am at heart an introvert, despite being tagged as an extrovert by everyone when they first meet me. Hey! Just because you can talk to anyone doesn't mean you really are eager to share your inmost soul to them, or that you want to talk when you're thinking through something!

Grown-Up Sleepovers!

Well, as I write, I am curled up with my old pal Scout the cat next to me. When did we get a cat? Well, never. :) Some of you long-time readers may remember my companion from two summers ago, when I lived with Glen & Bethany Moore, an Immanuel couple. Well, I'm back at their house, along with Ryan, Lyle, and another family from Immanuel/ Glen & Ryan's work. Why all the fun? Well, we just like having 7 adults and two babies in one house! Well... maybe more because the power is out all over Louisville, including dear little Top Porch. Ryan just went by there to check on it, and it's now 34 degrees in our living room. What's the use of having gas central heat if you still need electricity to run it!??? I do not know.

It's been a very fun break, though. Ryan didn't have to go IN to work until lunch time today, but was able to work from the Moore's house. I got lots of grading done (it had piled up during prep for the Christmas Concert), played with the babies, and did some communal cooking. Ryan & I had fun tramping through the snow, digging out our car (which performed like a champ-- we were so thankful to God for a reliable car right now!), and roughing it here in the Moore's living room. I'd never met Scott & Sunshine, and really enjoyed talking to Sunshine and playing with their baby, Jude. Of course, Ryan & I adore "little D"-- the Moore's baby, whom we've babysat before. Last night we all ate all sorts of leftovers

which everyone combined, and then I

got to make a cold-weather favorite-- Tapioca Pudding!

My choir papers lie in neat piles about me, most of them now graded, alphabetized into packets, and entered into my gradebook! I just emailed out a lesson plan to all the girls in my class, which required me to import ALL their family email addresses and create a sending list in my school email account. Why did I have to do that now? Well, usually our school office handles all the emails, but on Wednesday our school webmaster had a baby, AND all the power went down at the school, including I believe the server. So...I figured I'd better do it myself if I wanted the kids to actually have a chance to do any of their assignments. Anyway, I'm happy with my "work" done today, and am very excited about going on to more "fun" things... like reading! I've still got Wives & Daughters to finish-- it was too good to rush-- Girl Meets God to finish (it's mostly a re-read--excellent, by Lauren Winner) by Saturday, a chapter in Because He Loves Me to finish by tonight's Book Study, and a chapter in Fabricating Jesus; how modern scholars distort the Gospels, which I'm reading along with Ryan for his "Person & Work of Jesus" class! It's really easy reading, and quite thought-provoking. I'll probably write a whole post on IT! :) Oh yes, and there's always my journal to keep up... I'm a busy girl-- give me a day of peace and quiet and nowhere, no way to go, and I'm HAPPY!! :)

(Little D is taking a nap, or else I'd be sorely tempted to just play with him! He is SOOOO cute!)

Thankful for Christian brotherly hospitality,

--Christina

check out Wed Jan 14'ths post

...i finally got it to upload the image properly so that i could post it... don't know what the hangup was before... but it's up now; better late than never?

Snow Days Are a Teacher's Best Friend

I was a little concerned last night around 11, when nothing was falling from the sky at all, and I was feeling very very tired.  

Let me explain...  Lyle went with us to Moe's, then tux-fitting (we talked- about weddings, of course,- while Ryan got all measured), and then to Best Buy.  There he picked up Wall-E, I think as a very belated Christmas gift for his dad (Lyle's dad, if you are somehow reading this blog, I am so very sorry I just ruined it for you. :/).  Once we got home, the boys somehow convinced me to stay up and watch it with them, reassuring me with weather forecasts and satellite images that we WOULD have enough snow and ice to warrant school being cancelled Tuesday.  Wall-E was very much enjoyed-- it's amazing how much they are able to convey without dialogue; just electronic beeps, chirps, and grrrs as well as emotion wonderfully depicted with posture and eye shape.  I was very impressed.  I also loved the Hello Dolly clips interspersed throughout the movie-- Nicole, I thought of you & I trying to sing those songs.  We got the melodies right, at least... :)

So that led me to being still awake at 11 (barely), and wondering what I'd wear to school in the morning... which was looking very dark and soon.

I was a little concerned last night around 11, when nothing was falling from the sky at all, and I was feeling very very tired.

Well, by the Grace of God, we DID have a snow day, as Ryan assured me when my alarm went off at 6 am-- "Don't get up, Babe.  There's no way you have school today.  Don't even bother checking your email."  I believed him, figuring that at the worst Sina would call to tell me she was on her way and I'd have to drive myself.  

So, we've spent the day indoors, resting.  I worked on school stuff, got to read lots of the Bible in Ryan's new ESV Study Bible with the WONDERFUL footnotes, and am now finishing the last of my wedding thank-yous.  Yes, I know.  It's been 18 months.  But I WILL finish them!  (sorry if you still haven't gotten yours.  It's probably coming.)  Ryan's trying to kick a cold, so he stayed home (out of the freezing rain and ongoing snow), slept all morning and is now working a bit from home.  I made a pot of Cooped-Up Soup (that means anything that you have on hand and that would taste good heated up together)-- today that meant onion, garlic, tomato, brown rice, a bay leaf, rosemary, and salt simmering in homemade chicken bone broth.  Ryan says it's yummy and I'm about to try it out.   I love cold days when I'm allowed to stay home and inside! :)  

He Just Says it So Well!

“At present we are on the outside of the world, the wrong side of the door. We discern the freshness and purity of the morning, but they do not make us fresh and pure. We cannot mingle with the splendours we see. But all the leaves of the New Testament are rustling with the rumor that it will not always be so. Some day, God willing, we shall get in.”
- C.S. Lewis, The Weight of Glory (New York, NY: HarperOne, 2001), 43.


Oh! When I read something like this, I am reminded of just how much I want to "get in"!!! Maranatha! Even so, Lord Jesus, quickly come.

Moe Mondays

Tonight, barring snow or sleet (which, yes, is forecast for tonight-- but later tonight), Ryan & I will have a little date at Moe's, for $5.00. Yep, that's right! Every Monday at every Moe's, any burrito plus a drink is only $5.00. Combine that with the free salsa and chips, and you've got enough food for two! We always get a "naked" Homewrecker (naked meaning with the tortilla on the side, for my gluten-phobic sake...oh dear, how awful that name sounds: naked homewrecker), with its chicken on the side (because I can't eat it, either), and split it and a Dr. Pepper. I can't eat the chips either (soybean oil), so I get extra of the burrito, and then Ryan dumps his chicken in and finishes it off. We always end up both full and happy, and enjoy the $5.00 date. We like to go to the one up in Indiana, and run other errands too... like tonight we'll buy a new wireless router, so that Ryan can actually get a signal strong enough to WORK off of, and get him fitted for the tux he'll wear in Adam & Felicia's wedding coming up.

Go to your nearest Moe's now! Oh, and if you sign up for their "Moe's e-World," they email you coupons...such as the one awaiting me in my inbox for a free cup of queso. Five dollar date night just got better! :) Guess I'll be bringing my own chips tonight, too!

Transformation of Evil

“God did not abolish the fact of evil: He transformed it. He did not stop the Crucifixion: He rose from the dead.”

—Dorothy Sayers, Letters to a Diminished Church (Nashville, TN: W Publishing Group, 2004), 122-23

My friend Sina just recently told me about this website, Of First Importance, which is affiliated with a wonderful little book called The Gospel Primer. You can sign up to have a Gospel-centered and centering quote emailed to you every day. It's really cool! Anyway, this one was from a few days ago and I particularly appreciated it.

Random January Shots

Sarah reminded me of how much I love electric blankets, and we pulled mine out (it's been COLD). I just thought the tag was hilarious. What would a "helpless person" be, if not one of the other categories?

I was stuck in stand-still traffic right on my way to work, and was able to enjoy 2 sermons and a sunrise in my HEATED car (I was so thankful-- my old car's heater had gone out!)

My dear friend Wendy White came up from Greenville, just to encourage and serve Sina & I. We went out to eat at the North End Cafe, and it was YUMMY!

Such wonderful godly friends.

An awesome game to which our friends Josh & Sarah introduced us: Quelf. It involved wearing targets on our heads and singing songs backwards... among other things. We are SO buying that for... some holiday!
The characters have names like "Queen Spatula" or "The Biscuit Farmer"

Sarah, strategizing. (her fiance, Josh, was a high school crony of Ryan's, and it was really fun to be around them, and keep finding out that we are basically the same couple ...in different bodies!)

Ryan bought a hair brush!

New Addition to our House

Now you REALLY can't miss it!

Thanks to Dad Elder for this Christmas gift. WE LOVE IT!!!

Go Dad, Go!

My favorite part of the whole inauguration event: my dad (Bart Thompson- google it!)'s pet project (Tweels), featured in it! Tweels-- so-called because they are tires+wheels; no need for air-- are something my dad & his cronies & Michelin have developed over the past few years. The NASA Lunar Rover rode by on my dad's sweat and tears, you could say. Go, Dad, go! For a very cool look at the technology, check out this article on the event.

Diagramming...

Just two days ago I tried to diagram words to help them make sense to me... I know that might sound weird, but I am quite a visual person for all my auditory skills.  Anyway, the result was pretty cool (at least in my mind)... maybe someday I'll post it here.  I'm sure SOMEONE else out there has used word/idea-webs or graphic organizers to study or explain something... 

I just was reminded that this isn't a "new idea" with me-- I found this, which I did I believe my junior year of high school... maybe my senior year-- whenever I read CJ Maheney's The Cross-Centered Life for the first time, and had my world re-rocked.  I'd forgotten about this diagram, though-- just came across it now that I have most of my old files back from my resurrected PowerBook...  thank you again, Heath!! :)

Just thought I'd share!

Andrew Peterson CD

Does anyone else really really really want to buy the CD "Behold the Lamb of God" (Andrew Peterson's Christmas CD), but hasn't had an extra $15.00 lying around? If that's you, I just found out that if they are ordered in bulk, they are only $10.00 each! (if we order 5 at once. If we order 10, then they're only $9.00).

Let me know if you'd like one and I will gladly order it with mine.

As a plug, this album is by far my favorite Christmas album... maybe my favorite album ever. It's amazing. Talk about "redemptive history," talk about great story-telling... talk about the whole Bible sung in 12 tracks... it's soooo good!!! Like Handel's Messiah, except not choral, not symphonic, not Baroque... you get the idea. ;)

Listen to the album online here.

Pictures from the New Year

Courtney (my 17-year-old sister-in-law) came back with us from Canton, to spend a week here in Louisville! She & I had a goal of watching all the Harry Potter movies (I know, we're quite addicted), as well as pranking Ryan, exploring downtown, walking around outside somewhere, and getting a head start on "Bones," a TV serial about a forensic anthropologist which she & my mom-in-law thought I'd like. I'm happy to say that we did all of the above! :) The last Harry Potter movie was watched on the way to Tennessee (where we met Mom & Nathan and gave Courtney back, quite reluctantly), we walked all the way down 4th Street- including the Brown Hotel and the pedestrian-0nly blocks called "Fourth Street Live"- and drove across the bridges so she could see the City across the water, we (and Ryan) explored a park, and yes, I DID like "Bones," though not as much as N.C.I.S... ;) As for the prank on Ryan... we plead the fifth. ;)

Courtney & I playing around in The Brown's elevator (it was SO cold! we got to use our new winter gear!)

We went to our church's Wednesday Night Prayer service on New Year's Eve, and I was really convicted of a need to plead with God for His intervention to save our children this coming year. That conviction is staying with me. May God do great things in 2009!!

After the prayer service, Courtney, Ryan & I, along with another IBC-er, Jonathan went to the Shuey's for some Wii, "Apples to Apples," and lots of fun. I made cider and we brought eggnog, which we found out the Shueys had never had (except for Dave)! Fun was had by all, and now I think they know how to play "Apples to Apples" correctly. ;) Yes, we are the Rule Nazis, we know... and Ryan was a bit sore from Wii boxing, lol.

On New Year's Day we girls managed to drag Ryan out into the chill (it finally felt like winter) to go hike around Cherokee Park. The park system here is one of my favorite things about living in Louisville! We have lots of history here, Ryan & I ...picnic dates, big conversations, tree-climbing... Anyway, it was a good refreshing walk.

The cover for our new rock album, Spike the Volume.

Lyle came over on New Year's Day, for fajitas, "The Fifth Element," home-made vanilla ice cream (made by the boys), and of course... DDR.

While she was here, Courtney got a crash-course in gluten-free baking/cooking, and she performed admirably. We had a great time, making cinnamon-rolls, pizza, fajitas, stir-fry, Mexican beans & rice, and pancakes. Yumm!!!

Now she's gone, and we miss her! Our house feels empty... it's just us two, after a week of being around family and lots of friends. It's sort of surreal. On the way back from dropping Courtney off, we stopped for dinner in Nashville, TN, where my Aunt Robin & Uncle Duncan entertained Ryan & I with a WONDERFUL dinner. We had fun playing with the kids, as you can see.

A Luke Tower-- Lyke wouldn't sit in my lap, so I sat on him instead... :)

I've got a lot more pictures uploaded on Facebook, so you can enjoy them

Christmas Pictures, finally

I've put pictures online through Facebook, and I think my sisters in law have as well. Enjoy!

Merry Christmas!

...from Canton, GA!
Ryan & I drove down here in our NEW Chevy Malibu, "Roxy," on Monday, and have been hanging out with our family since. More on Roxy later-- like her predecessors, Max & Caleb, she is burgundy/red. Unlike them, she is completely UNbroken! No tape, no dents, no scratches... it's pretty amazing to us both!

We've enjoyed both chilly and warmer weather, Dominoes, Rummikub, Cranium, good food, good movies (like The Tale of Despereaux), family, talking, stories, Grandpa's fudge, and even walking around the subdivision. I've tried my hand at adapting some recipes to gluten-freeness for the whole family (a little scary for everyone, I think!-- certainly for me!); pancakes & eggs for breakfast yesterday, and pumpkin pie today. Both were met with at the very least consumption, and at best decisive compliments, so I am very grateful. I was praying for culinary grace there!

We opened presents from our drawn-name-recipient last night (Christmas Eve)...hehe story there for another day... that was really fun. The gifts this year were so creative and thoughtful! When we're home with our cable, I'll upload some pics! Grandma got a digital camera from her daughters & sons-in-law, and was rendered speechless for an entire minute! (that is a feat indeed!) This morning we waited for the Grands to get here (we're all at Ryan's parents' townhouse, but they're staying at the AFB hotel), and after reading the Nativity account in St. Luke 2, we opened the rest of our presents. Ryan got me three books which I am already delving into-- I'm in the middle of one that he found in a little shop in New Orleans on his last business trip called The Legacy of St. Patrick; as found in his own writings (Martin P. Harney). It's so inspiring! The man was such a champion of the faith! (the other books were Tales of Beedle the Bard by JK Rowling, and ). Ryan's quite happy with his ESV Study Bible from me. Oh yes and I can't WAIT to listen to my new Andrew Peterson Resurrection Letters, Vol. II.!!!

From a very warm Canton, GA, Ryan & I wish you all a wonderfully happy-to-your-toes celebration of the Incarnation. I'm reading Lauren Winner's Girl Meets God right now (highly recommended), and her Advent chapters are very very insightful! Maybe tomorrow I'll put a quote from her book on here-- it was the doctrine of the Incarnation, of God becoming Immanuel- God with us- which first drew her to Christianity out of the rich tradition of Orthodox Judaism.

Embrace the wonder of it! Just think...

"In the Beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word WAS God... and the Word of God became flesh and tabernacled among us, and we beheld His glory..." (Jn. 1:1,14). Amazing. In all the foreshadowing and promises, no one expected that God would send Himself to save His people... I guess the tabernacle was the biggest clue-- by law it was to be always smack dab in the very middle of the people's camp, and because of it's presence the people were both commanded to be and declared holy-- because their God was in their midst. And then in the person and physical body of Jesus the Christ, He actually came and walked among us, as one of us. And He's promised to never never ever leave us.

Wow.

Merry Christmas.

Presley Side Christmas Pic

Aren't we so photogenic!?

Per Mom's Request...

Some Christmas decorations pictures from Top Porch...

Hey, Beautiful Girl

So I ordered this CD for 2 little boys in my life- my cousin Luke and "nephew" Noah- and have in the meantime fallen in love with it. (I HAD to check it out before sending it on, right?) It's WONDERFUL!!!! I highly recommend it, if you have small children, or if you have children in your home on any sort of regular basis... or if you are intimidated by children and want to learn how to cuddle, romp and laugh with them! I suspected I'd love it, because one- Andrew Peterson's grasps the vast sweep of "redemptive history" (how God has worked in the world since the beginning). Two, he's a great songwriter, so I knew the lullabies would be solid and sweet, singable.Three, he "gets" little boys. His song "Little Boy Heart Alive" is still one of my all-time favorite songs because I love little boys, and he totally captures why in that song. And last of all, after reading On the Edge of the Dark Sea of Darkness (Ryan & I read it out loud together and LOVE IT!!) I knew the CD would be fun! If you've ever listened to his song "Matthews Begats" about Jesus' geneology in Matthew 1, you know what I mean. I have not been disappointed. He's got a song about an action-packed game of tag ("Who's Got the Ball!?"), one with a hilarious twist ("Tractor, Tractor"), and a great one about getting a baby to burp ("Chicken Wiggle"--it starts out "Burp, burp, chicken wiggle! Don't spit up! Don't spit up!"), all sung with such a "straight face" and legitmately orchestrated that it's even funnier!! So, all in all, great CD. Go get it. On iTunes it's $9.99 for a download, which is the best deal I've found so far.

Quotes from the artists (which sort of tell you what the CD is like): "Parents won't want to stick a fork in their eye when they've heard it for the 10th time in a row." -- Randall Goodgame
"It's the first time I've been glad that my music can put people to sleep." -- Andrew Peterson

Surprisingly, the song on this CD that is currently on repeat, bringing tears to my eyes at times, has nothing to do with anything little-boy or fun. It's a lullaby sung by a father to his baby girl, starting off with the desperate lines "I've got you swaddled/and I've got your bottle/ and you're too loud to ignore./ Your mama is sleeping/ the angels are keeping/ so cry no more." That's all sweet, and so true to reality that it makes me smile. Then came the chorus,

"Hey! Beautiful girl! Daddy loves you!

He loves you!

Most beautiful girl in the whole wide world."

All of a sudden the Spirit whispered to my soul "that is how I sing over you." Michael Card says that he thinks God loves each of us "naively;" like a lover who knows the beloved is unique and precious; like He said of Job "there's no one like him!" We know from Zephaniah that "The Lord your God is in your midst, a Mighty One who will save; He will rejoice over you with gladness; He will quiet you by his love; He will exult over you with loud singing." (Zeph 3:17). As I read the Bible, and especially since going through the book Because He Loves Me (Elyse Fitzpatrick), I have realized more and more that God loves me deeply. Why? Because I am in Jesus. Jesus, the Perfectly obedient Son. Jesus, the Beloved. The One of Whom the Father said, "this is my Beloved Son, with Whom I am well-pleased." (Mt. 17:5, Mk. 1:11, Lk. 3:22, 2 Pet. 1:17). I am in THAT Son! When God looks at me, He sees that Perfect Obedience, and He smiles-- wouldn't you!? Washed clean by Jesus' blood, swaddled in Jesus' righteousness, He holds me close and all He does is smile. A man asked me last week if I loved God, and my impromptu answer was to stammer "Yes! Yes! He loved me first!" He did. He pursued me with His love, and put me into the Beloved... because I got IN to His love quite apart from any merit of my own, I don't have to be afraid of ever falling OUT of it by any of my mis-doings. I am secure. To my Heavenly Father, I am always the "most beautiful girl in the world." Wow.

My throat is all lumped-up just thinking about it.

The God of the Universe smiles and sings me lullabies.

Knowing my self and my persistent, hard-to-kill sins as I do... and knowing that He knows it even more than I do, and that He hates sin more than I do because He is more perfect and completely apart from it (holy)... wow, that makes it even sweeter and more amazing.

Thinking of one of my sisters who is facing so much hurt from those who had sworn to love and protect her in this world, I suddenly wanted to send her this song; to remind her of Who loves her, and Who thinks she is the "most beautiful girl in the whole wide world," no matter what. Not because of anything she does or did or will do, but because she is in the Beloved. For all of you who are in Christ, this is how our Father sings over YOU!!!

"Hey, beautiful girl, Daddy loves you; He loves you- most beautiful girl in the whole wide world..."

The Ones You Leave Behind, the final version =D

Being back in Greenville, especially for church services at Grace, is fun in that I get to reconnect (briefly) with people I've loved for a long time, and who know me well. It's sad, though, too. Why? Because of a problem that's systemic around here. Grace Baptist of Taylors has long been a large church, regularly adding members. So why hasn't it ever really grown? Because people are always leaving. Every few years there's a new church on the block that comes into vogue and several families leave to go there (I could name 3 such churches off the top of my head). There are SO many families that "used to go to our church," most still living in Greenville, and still naming the Name of Jesus. I'm not talking about people who were just attenders, either, I'm talking about people who had applied for membership, testified in front of the entire body, read the church confession of faith and constitution and gladly agreed with them, willingly put themselves under the guidance and oversight of the pastors and deacons, and been in regular fellowship with other members for several years. Yet they leave. For diverse reasons, they just walk away, most without ever so much as a peep as to why, nor efforts to resolve anything.

Every time I come back to Greenville, I am grieved anew at this. Christians, let me plead with you: don't leave your church! As I hope to expound in this post, it is (usually) un-Biblical, and always always hurtful-- to you as the leave-er, and, as I have experienced first hand, to those whom you are leaving behind. It hurts. A lot. To the point that I struggle with bitterness towards those who have left, the mere thought or sight of them bringing all those negative feelings back up.

So, why stay? First of all, because, if you're a Protestant, you've made a covenant with those people in that particular local church. A church isn't primarily a set of doctrines, nor a set of traditions, nor even a set of pastors/deacons/leaders (or the main preaching pastor)--it's certainly not the building. (When Paul wrote to the church in Corinth he was writing to the group of believers in Corinth.) When you leave a church, you may be leaving because of a disagreement with church leaders, or because of a deficiency in the preached word, or because you aren't feeling like your gifts aren't being used adequately, but you aren't leaving any of those things. When you leave, you are leaving your fellow members. Just as a divorce severs one human from another, so leaving a church rips apart christians joined by a covenantal bond.  My dad put it perfectly into words when he said, rather sadly, "I can't help feeling that they're just walking away from... me... from all my family.  And that hurts."
-----------My apologies for leaving this so long unfinished.  I now have my computer back after a long absence, thanks to my cousin Heath's kindness, his electrotechnical prowess, and a rather sizeable dose of daring (he disassembled and reassembled a Powerbook on his own)!  Anyway, I'm back now.---------------

The church is often compared to a Body (Eph. 4).  In one sense we CANNOT leave The Body, ever-- the Church Universal is made up of all believers, no matter their denomination or age.  It will be united and whole in Heaven, but is only seen in glimpses here.  The local church is how we worship now.  [Aside: Unfortunately, there is division, which is necessary because there is error, much of it heretical, and truth naturally must divide from error when error refuses to be corrected.  There are also differences of understanding, which make everyday church life detrimental rather than helpful.  SO yeah, I understand why we have denominations, and why these probably won't go away until Heaven.]  The local churches are like mini-bodies.  In our world, can hands just rip themselves off of one body and transfer to another body, without careful preparation, re-attachment, and a high risk of infection? Yikes, no!  So leaving one local fellowship must be approached- carefully, slowly- no matter the reason, even a positive one.  Just walking away isn't "seeking peace with all men."  It's a cop-out.

Secondly, there isn't any Scriptural basis for leaving.  You want a really awful church?  Take the one in First-Century Corinth.  you've got factions (1 Cor. 1-3) , disagreement over the authority of the apostles (chapter 4) gross sexual immorality (5-incest/adultery; 6-promiscuity), people suing each other (6), people with weird ideas about celibacy (7), gluttony & discrimination in Communion (10), chaotic worship services (14), and even doubts about the resurrection of Christ!! (15) All this to the point that God was putting church members to death in loving judgement (11:13)!! I find it so striking that Paul nowhere commands the faithful to leave and start another church.  NOWHERE!  On the contrary, he exhorts them to be unified, to stop sinning and embrace righteousness, and then -as a unified body- to discipline those in their midst who insisted on persisting in sin.  Nowhere do we read anything like "but if these issues seem disturbing, you should leave these so-called brothers of yours and quietly begin worshipping in the house of a faithful man.  I will send another pastor to shepherd you there soon."  Granted, there wasn't "First Church of Straight Street of Corinth," competing with "First Modern Church of Corinth--"  they were all house fellowships, probably meeting in different locations as persecution came and their numbers grew, yet still in fellowship and communion with each other-- so it's not like they could really leave a church in the same way we can now (which I believe is a travesty!).  Instead, Paul had the confidence that I do: that the work of the Holy Spirit, through the Word spoken and read, will transform a church rife with problems and DEAL with those problems.  I am NOT advocating silently letting Jesus' church do things utterly dishonoring to Him.  Paul doesn't tell people to just stick it out without a peep-- on the contrary, he rebukes them, and urges church discipline!  In other letters he does the same to other churches.  So does Jesus in Revelation 2.  If you've see an issue in a church, and after much prayer you still see it, it's probably there!  So do you just leave?  Is that the Biblical thing to do?  Is that the God-glorifying-est option? If we can't easily answer those questions, we can certainly answer this one:  is it the most loving, others-serving thing to do?  As one of those left behind, I can painfully say, "no."  It sure isn't loving to leave someone in their sin, ignorance, misunderstanding or struggle; neither is it loving to leave a group of people similarly set.  Talk to us!  Tell us what you think and what you see!  Oh how I grieve when I imagine how strong and joyful Grace Baptist would be if all those who had left had stayed.  Such godly people!  Such diversity, such strength there would be!  Oh, why did you leave!?  I plead with you who haven't left yet (and if you've just left, come back!), instead of leaving, work to BE a part of the solution.  SERVE us if we are weak.  That's how Jesus dealt with the 12!  He was so far above their petty arguments over who was the Greatest, and He didn't leave them.  On the contrary, He washed their feet and died for them.  Don't walk away in your "strength" and leave us in our weakness.

Thirdly, whoever you are:  you are a sinner!!  What does that have to do with anything?  It means I KNOW you will never find a perfect church:  wherever you go, YOU will be there, so it WON'T be perfect.  Gospel-embracing churches, made up of Gospel-embracing people, are beautiful precisely because they are embracing the Gospel-- that means they are loudly proclaiming that it took the death of God to pay for their God-offending sin, and that they STILL need His grace every single day!  The best churches are ones full of self-acknowledged sinners... meaning that even the best churches will still be flawed.  The excuse "I wasn't growing anymore, so I left" is one that is waaaay over-used.  And that is your pastor's fault how?  Is it ever valid?  Quite likely.  If the Word is not being faithfully taught and given as food, the people will be hungry.  But again, is the answer to immediately, quietly, leave?  NO!!  The problem might be you!  Are you resisting growth?  Are you being lazy in your pursuit of personal holiness, and then blaming a preacher or a teacher for not pulling you along?  Are you being open and honest, confessing and confronting sin to/in your friends, or are you remaining isolated, surface-deep, and blind?  You will not grow if you are not pursuing the means of grace.  "The godly are easily encouraged," as one man said.  If you are honestly pursuing growth and it is not coming, or if you see a deficiency, then speak up!  Go humbly to your brother and share your burden for his good, your good, and the good of all your neighbors.  Your pastor may not be the best preacher, but he probably loves you. If you see a lack of clear teaching, be open to modeling good teaching.  If you sense shallow "fellowship," invite a few out for coffee and try to be open with them (do a book study on "Because He Loves Me," "The Cross-Centered Life," "Gospel Transformation," or "A Gospel Primer" for great starters).  PRAY.  The Lord might use YOU to be the agent of grace in the church where you are struggling.  Look around at the people you're thinking of abandoning, and think "wouldn't I rather be used to encourage them?"  God has you where you are for a reason.  It probably isn't to just stop growing spiritually, whimper and then slink out.

Lastly, you are hurting yourself, and setting yourself up for blindness and sin.  Leaving a church always hurts you, even if you don't expect it to.  When you leave those who know you best, and start over somewhere else, you lose the accountability you had.  You open the door to sin and blindness-- because who's gonna know you there?  Who will love you enough to speak the truth in love?  You are likely taking a shortcut, the easy way out, and we all know that isn't how God's Grace works. He saves us all at once (justification), but then He keeps saving us (sanctification) for long agonizing joyful years.  He doesn't infuse us with patience; no, He gives the testing of our faith which PRODUCES patience (James 1:2).  That means He gives us hard medicine that tastes yucky, to work a beautiful cure.  That might include bearing with a church that's not perfect, and working lovingly, humbly with them THROUGH those imperfections, both teaching and being taught.  Maybe you feel like your church isn't letting you live up to your full potential.  Maybe that's because you think too highly of your potential.  The one who skips all that and walks away is taking the easy way out.  We shun quick fixes like diet pills... why do we think a quick fix of a church change will be any better for our spiritual health?  I've seen people leave because they were having marital problems, because they just broke up, because their children were rebelling, and shame drove them away.  "What would people say if they knew?"  Yikes!  You NEED those who love you and will speak the truth and listen in love, more than ever.  You of all people, stay!  Let us love you! Yeah, it will hurt, and it will be hard... but it's still good.  Slightly differently, I've heard people leave because they were newly weds and/or new parents and wanted to start out on their own or find a church that could better serve them at that new stage.  The same applies to you!  You are not as strong as you think you are.

One last word to those who want to leave a fellowship for entirely other reasons- maybe a passion for a certain people group, maybe a gifting that's duplicated within your church fellowship.  Those gifts are given you by God TO SERVE HIS CHURCH.  First of all, talk to your church leaders- don't just "inform" them that you are leaving and why.  Let them be a part of it-- they are your authority and can give guidance you need.  Then talk to your fellow church members, at least some of it.  Don't they deserve an explanation, if not consultation?  Do they see how you could plug into the church?  If they agree that your leaving is advantageous to the Gospel, and your passions & gifts can't be incorporated into your church body as it is, then by all means expand your church!  Start a new ministry.  Move to that other neighborhood, or city, or country.  If it just isn't feasible to stay at your church, make it a matter of expansion and growth, not disunion and stunting.  Gather people around you, watching your back, holding you accountable, and praying for you.  At the very least, be honest.  Wouldn't you rather be sent than just leave?

I write this so thankful for those who have stayed at Grace.  I have watched you grow as you've stayed and pressed on.  I will testify of how it has done you good; how you have been rewarded for your steadfastness, patience, and willingness to be wronged.  Your faces flash across my mind, and I'm afraid to name you, because I know I'll leave someone out, but I also want to honor those deserving of honor. ... remember that I'm typing this from 450 miles away, and be gracious to me. :) Glenn & Helen, Mark & Cheryl, David & Kimi, Bruce & Jean, Jamie & Lydia, Ed & Miriam, Lou & Sally- you've been there since before I was. Ben & Denise, Ryan & Lydia, Craig & Ashley- you've stayed when many of your age left.  Blaine & Wendy, Jack & Janice, Jim & Robin, Mark & Kathryn, Seth & Katie, Victor & Ellen- you put your hand to the plow and haven't turned back.  Chad & Melanie, Glyn & Jo Lin, Doug & Beth, Mike & Linda, Todd, Ravonda, Pene-- you came and haven't left.  Of course there's my parents, Bart & Karina.  And Bob & Cathi, Aaron & Rachel, we know you love us and are so glad you're back.  

Please know that I write this in all humility, out of deep love for the honor and good of Christ's Bride-- He values her, thus so should I!--and especially my brothers at Grace, who have been hurt again and again.  May God in His mercy strengthen you and use you to do great things!

--Christina